“Your Heart is a Weapon the Size of your Fist. Keep loving, keep fighting, keep writing.” (A sentimental tale of synchronicity)

Most writers have a mantra of some sort. This is the story of mine.

Wise words  from the amazing street-artist Charles Uzzell-Edwards of Pure Evil Gallery – and my inspiration for the ‘Break-up Club’ – my latest novel (and now TV Comedy Drama pilot)… Below is the very sentimental tale of serendipity and the kindness of strangers…which I’m sharing one week on as an alternative Valentine’s day message, one week on from 14th Feb…

IMG_7785 IMG_7788

It was some time in 2009, and I was in the middle of a stinky break-up (along with my BUC comrades). I was walking home through Shoreditch in the dark, wondering if I’d ever love again, and other self-indulgent pangs – when I happened to walk past this street art fly-posted to a brick wall. I didn’t know what it was or where it had come from, but I do know it stopped me in my tracks, and gave me a tiny bolt of hope. 

Maybe – just maybe – we’d all be OK. I took this photo of it, stuck it on my noticeboard, and started writing a novel about how break-ups might seem like the worst thing ever, but actually, they make you stronger in ways you could never imagine. I put this quote in the front of book, as I thought it made a great opener. My friend Em was also struck by it, and stuck it up on her wall while she wrote the pilot for her awesome TV series (which would later be sold to ITV).

A year or so later, I was walking round a different part of Shoreditch, not quite sure what to do with myself, having just said good-bye to my darling father at the London Heart Hospital. If you’ve ever been blessed with compassionate leave, then you’ll know it’s a strange sort of numb and fuzzy fortnight where you wander round in the middle of the day while everyone’s at work. You’re not sure what to do with all this spare time, but you’re being fussed over with love and flowers from everyone in a way that feels like a weird inverted birthday and you’re infinitely grateful for it…. but you’d swap it in a heartbeat for one more second with your loved one.

Anyway, there I was, walking the streets in a broken-hearted stupor again, when I passed the same poster. But this time it was a framed print, staring at me through a sheet of glass. The door was open so I wandered in, and started warbling on to the man in the gallery about how much I loved this piece of street-art. For some reason, the man took pity on me (It was probably my bloodshot eyes, or my snotty nose), but I told him all about my dad, my silly book about break-ups, and how this quote had been a kind of torchlight. This lovely man – Charley – he said his name was – reached into one of his really long art drawers, and pulled out an original signed A1 print.

As he handed it to me it felt like another bolt of hope that everything was going to be OK. I didn’t realize then that he was the actual famous artist, who is better known by the moniker of Pure Evil. Stunned by his generosity, I took the print home, and my lovely mum had it beautifully framed.

It then hung in my office next to me while I finished the book – which was no picnic when I was pining for my dad most days, and also still undiagnosed ADHD so struggling with burnout and a complete lack of Creative Satnav, so wasted years getting lost in the woods and going round in plot circles. But eventually I made it to ‘The End’ and got a deal with Harper Collins. like my dad always said, what does not kill you makes you stronger. To be clear, he was channeling the great German philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche – not Kelly Clarkson!

It’s true of course. No matter how shitty things get, you always rise again from the rubble, more emotionally toned than before. But this episode also taught me something else – that sometimes the kindness of strangers is that last push you need to pick yourself up and carry on. Like when Holly (my character) is on the bus sobbing her eyes out over Lawrence and a kind old lady gives her her bottle of water. Anyway, I finally finished the novel, and it’s out there! I’m probably making far too big a big deal of this, but I just wanted to write this by way of thank you to Charles – kind stranger, whose brilliant words are still right there in the prologue.

And as a final irony in the tale, when I came over to Venice Beach, LA to celebrate my book being released, and to start work on the screenplay adaptation, Charley himself was over there, having an art gallery opening that same night, streets away from where I was having the book launch… Honestly – serendipity really does make the world go round sometimes!

 

13315768_10156893323845543_2111570058115643878_n

UPDATE: I wrote about this story a few years ago but now, 6 years later, the TV comedy drama script adaptation I’ve written also has the poster itself in the script! 

IMG_7775In the final scene of the pilot script, the main character Holly walks past the poster in the final scene, just as she’s on the threshold of a break-up herself. So far it’s been top 4% of BBC Writers’ Room and the Thousand Films Competition (losing to the amazing Extraordinary! Fair enough!)

The script is currently with a channel being read…. please cross fingers that it gets picked up!

Also, series two is set in Venice Beach… where the Los Angeles franchise of ‘The Break Up Club’ gets going…

 

 

Anyway, whether you had a happy Valentine’s Day this year – or  a crappy one because you’ve recently loved and lost – don’t lose heart. Keep loving, keep fighting… keep writing 🙂

 

‘It’s your friends that keep you afloat’ – A deep dive in to the brilliant new Josie Lloyd novel #LifeSavingForBeginners

Ahoy there! A quick post to tell you about fellow writer & mermaid @JosieLloydWriter’s brilliant novel #LifeSavingForBeginners which comes out this Thursday. These are a few of the reasons why I loved it, and why I think you should read it…

🌊 It’s a love letter to Brighton & Hove. A hymn to the power of the sea, and of friendship.

🌊It perfectly captures the way that the sea is our religion. The way we flock there for morning prayer every day we can, via the magic of whatsapp. (Only this morning I was on a snooze-marathon when the reply to my ‘shall we’ got me up and at ‘em like nothing else can, chucking on my ‘no-thinking’ suit & swim shoes and running down to the shore where Susie, Josie and Ziggy the four-legged coast-guard were waiting and we swam out to the second buoy, leaving us feeling charged up for the rest of the day!)

🌊 It’s a celebration of the strength of the sea, and how it really does make you feel super-powered (or, after a winter swim, invincible) against whatever the day throws at you. It’s amazing for dimming the din of the #ADHD brain too. It is absolutely our lifeline. The days I don’t swim, I really feel it. What’s so lovely in ‘Lifesaving for Beginners’ is that the more they swim, the more the sea slowly gives each character strength, (and not just in their muscles).

🌊 It has some lovely depictions of the moon-swim massives… only the other night we were bopping about to music in the waves under a salmon moon just like in the novel! (See fig B)

Pic – @Lunartidalcalendar
Pic – Ruby Moon Full Moon swim, courtesy of Splashers & Bobbers swimming whatsapp group & Lunar Tidal Calendars

🌊 It’s super skilfully plotted, with all the threads overlapping wonderfully – so much so that I yelped in glee on the beach yesterday at my friend when a plot twist happened that made me so relieved for one of the characters!

🌊 There is SO much wisdom in the book. Insights into ‘The Change’ that really made me think. And facts about the moon and how it affects the tides, that I’ve never quite understood but now do…just about!

🌊 It very cleverly weaves in the issue of the sewage crisis into the story in a non-preachy way… with some lovely plugs for our @southcoastsirens and @SASBrighton and the dangers of those @southernwatermedia ‘spills’.

🌊 Above all… it’s so visceral in its description of cold-water swimming, and of the warmth of friendship:) If you enjoyed the cameraderie in #BreakUpClub or if you love swimming, or if you’ve ever thought about running away to the seaside… you need to read this book! It made me laugh, it made me smile in recognition, it made me cry AT LEAST three times.

🌊 It made me so grateful to be part of the real life Sea-Gals (and guys!). I was given Josie’s first book #ComeTogether to work on in the Random House Marketing division when I was fresh out of uni. I was a fan girl then; I never dreamed 20 years later I’ve ended up in Hove as a sea-gal! Small world to say the least.

Congrats Josie, and good luck with the launch this Thursday! I’ve no doubt it will be a huge success for you… and for Brighton tourism! I reckon once people read this novel, new seagal recruits will flock here in their Dry-robes in droves, and our lovely beach will be even busier… luckily there’s plenty of sea to go around. See you on the pebbles:)

Pic – courtesy of Splashers & Bobbers swimming whatsapp group

PS Here are a few of my favourite extracts which sum up why I love this book… albeit badly snapped, sorry…

LifeSavingForBeginners is out this Thursday with Harper Collins @hqstories – Order your copy now!

I Am a Mermaid… HELP – Introducing ‘The Litter Mermaid” – my Comedy Short

My Comedy Short, ‘The Litter Mermaid’ is the story of the plastic crisis in our seas, and the impact it is having on the mermaid community and their King. You can watch the trailer here.

Thank you to everyone that helped make this – From the old friend I’d known since I was 21 who literally IS a mermaid, the beautiful Lisa, to the new friends that stepped straight off of Ramsay Street to produce and crew the thing up thanks to Brendan… to my genius housemate Michelle who dressed the set and the entire mythological population on nothing but a fin-string and made ‘spoofy condoms’ out of mayo.

I was blown away the next day when I was out walking with my adorable nephew in Brighton Beach, just a few shores down from Elwood where we’d wrapped 12 hours before…and we were playing the ‘hunt the lost flip-flop’ game that I often play as someone with ADHD who sunbathes on boardwalks – when we both looked down and saw this freakish message, carved into the rocks. ‘I AM A MERMAID. HELP.’ Of all the rocks in all the world… it really did seem like someone out there was ‘winking’ at us. or that the seas really have reached peak Plastic and they’re sending us a message… in  a plastic bottle.

47364279_1815906591865420_5378984640277118976_n
Alana speaks… Literally stumbled across this the day after shooting the film, in Elwood/Brighton Beach. Truly, the seas are trying to tell us something.

What’s it about? It’s about some mythical creatures who very much DO NOT want to be where the people are…

King Neptune and his team have been glorified maids of the sea for long enough, they’ve got zero job satisfaction and they are over it. Soon there’ll be more plastic than fish… but do the Human Resources department give a cr*p? Find out in The Litter Mermaid – a comedy about plastic, a tragedy about our world, and the melancholy fact that there’s now an island of plastic the size of France in our oceans.  Shot on location in Elwood Beach, Melbourne it’s the next film under fledgling channel Melon Comedy. 

It features shocking new footage of polluted oceans in Indonesia, from Rich Horner The Rubbish Diver,  and with a cast & crew from Melbourne, London & Bali’s Comedy scene, and a cameo from my aquatic alter ego, mermaid Loreley.

See the full film here: s https://www.chortle.co.uk/video/2019/04/22/42861/the-litter-mermaid

Full Cast & Credits:

Dave Callan as Neptune
Lisa Fineberg as Alana
Pam Rana as Human Resources 1
Jonathan Schuster as Human Resources 2
Urvi Majumder as Ariel
Lorelei Mathias as Loreley
and introducing Monty The Manta-ray, and the Balinese Jellyfish

Executive Producer Brendan Geaney
Associate Producer Emmy McMorrow
Editor Claire McGonagil
Sound Design Brendan Geaney
Director of Photography Oscar Beltran Cuba
First Assistant Director Julian Breheny
Assistant Producers Brendan Geany
Production Manager Andrew Keane
Art Direction & Wardrobe Michelle Harrington
Camera Assistant/B-Cam Samuel Wong
Sound Kristian Pilsko
Boom Operator/Runner Terry Shepherd
Post – Kyra Hendrix, Significant Other New York
Hair & Make-up Hannah Williams
First Assistant Director Julian Breany
Production Manager Andrew Keane
Driver Jeremy Densley
Catering Palmer & Pot

Written & Directed by Lorelei Mathias. Additional dialogue by the cast, Anthony Noack, and John Campbell.
Composer, musician & vocalist & original score ‘This Time That Is Mine – Alana’s Lament’ by Camilla Mathias.