What do Jordan Catalano, Barry from Eastenders and Winnie Cooper all have in common?


Showing my age now, aren’t I?!

Happy Sunday all. When you have a spare 90 seconds – here’s my new book trailer!

I hope you like it, and if you do I’d be gargantuously (?) grateful if you could share with anyone you think might like it too!



There’s a prize for anyone who can tell me every single film/TV show is referenced… and a bonus point for how many people there are in it called Amelie. Really nerdy amounts of knowledge required to know that though…

Thank you for watching!




Break Up Club – opening soon, and you’re all invited!

Which is code for… I have a new novel coming out…really rather soon. Hooray! That didn’t take long, did it?

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It’s a love story about break-ups, starring four Londoners at the fag-end of their twenties.

It celebrates what becomes of the consciously-uncoupled, when they happen to all consciously-uncouple at the exact same time…. end up forming a slightly pathetic club, and fall head over heels for each other.

It also (I hope) uncovers a truth not yet universally acknowledged – that a break-up shared, is a break-up halved.

I’ve been writing it for about five years in my spare time, in between writing adverts and lots of other lovely things – and in between various boring health problems and sad things, hence the major hold-up! There were times when I thought I’d never finish it – it’s been such a labour of love. But persistence is the thing, the absolute thing… that and microwaved popcorn!

It was originally called ‘Break up Club’, on account of how the main star of the book is the club itself… but it now goes by the sassier name of ‘Reader, I Dumped Him – a love story about break-ups.’ (You know, like Jane Eyre used to say).

The cover’s being revealed on 27.4.16 at 7pm, by the amazing people at Avon/Maze (part of Harper Collins) and the full blurb is here in this nice review

If it was a TV series it would be The Breakfast Club meets This Life, but way more dysfunctional, and immature…

It’ll be published on 4th February, as the ultimate Crappy Valentines Day read!

Oh look, it’s actually already on Amazon here.

We’ll be revealing some extracts, a trailer and other fun things very soon.

‘Til then, thanks for reading, and remember – if you ever need a post-break-up shoulder to cry on, don’t attempt to go it alone! I’m here for you. Along with four beautiful fuck-ups who also know that break-ups are the worst thing ever – Harry, Holly, Bella and Olivia.





Spread the love this Valentines Day not with an Elizabethan Sonnet, but with one of these…

Hugh Grant, on a greetings card:

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Or any one of these emotionally repressed valentines cards for us Brits here.


Conversely, you could go for one of  these much less uptight chappies:



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From the pure poetry that is pornhubcommentsonvalentines.com – (thanks Martin H for discovering them)


Finally there’s always this miserable bugger, guaranteed to have your beloved falling at your feet in a collapsed heap of undying adoration.


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From Mister Bob Brian