“Fact times importance equals news!” Behold David Dimbledonkey’s election coverage

Armando Iannucci once told The Times that, “I always put in side stories that I think are just too daft, and then you find they’ve actually happened…I watched an ITN report and thought: ‘That’s exactly the same as a scene we did in The Day Today. But as a joke! It was very weird.”  

Now, as our colleague Tom Langdon just pointed out, this trailer for Dimbleby’s election news coverage bears an uncanny resemblance to the kind of laboured, overly literal graphics which Brant, Chris Morris’ physical cartoonist would employ for comic merit.

“David, who will pave the way to Number Ten?” asks Jeremy Vine. And then, lo, behold, many many paving stones fall down to symbolise each constituency, literally paving the way to Number Ten. You have to wonder whether Peter O’Hanraha-hanrahan himself will be joining David tonight. Here’s hoping.

In other election-related trivia, a friend in Nice sent me some random election-related facts today, and I thought these two odd enough to share:

Number 10 Downing Street was number 5 until 1779. 

Its last private resident was called Mr Chicken.

Thanks Miranda. Happy election day, anyway. May the best man win. Or something.

Brief Encounters of the worst kind

Is this a stunt? Is Illicitencounters.com a spoof website made by a marriage guidance website or something? Or a new campaign for the Alpha Course, to shock people into then wanting to be indoctrinated in the ways of God-like fidelity?

Apparently not. According to Campaign, “IllicitEncounters.com, the UK’s largest extra-marital dating site, is
on the hunt for creative and media buying agencies that can help it
with the tricky task of getting ads into mainstream media. The site, which aims to provide a safe and non-judgmental environment
where married men and women can meet each other, currently has over
450,000 members in the UK, and is looking to expand its database
through a series of mainstream ad campaigns.”

And they say Romance is dead. I thought online dating sounded bad enough, but online extra-marital online dating, that’s taking desperation to a whole new level isn’t it?

What’s that old saying, ‘you can’t hurry extra-marital love?’ You know, ‘Don’t go looking, you just wait for affairs to happen naturally, when you least expect it…’

Ok, so these sites exist. But I sincerely hope no agency wants to pitch for them. I mean, yes Advertising is kind of a moral vortex at the best of times, but I can’t imagine anyone wanting to work on this? Cigarettes and fur seem hugely ethical suddenly.

Perhaps they don’t need an agency. Maybe they just need to take the previous Match.com or campaign and insert the word ‘extra-marital’ at every touchpoint. e.g. Don’t wait for Cupid and Fate. Get out there and ‘Make Adultery Happen.’ etc etc. 

Sorry, rant over.