First off, we promise that will definitely be the final lame Cannes-pun. At least for another year.

Unlike the rest of the world who were sunning themselves in Pilton last weekend, we were away in Cannes. Regrettably, we had no actual passes to The Work. So we will not be reporting on any of the serious goings on.

Anyone looking for an informative, astute commentary on this year’s Lions, look away now. This blog is all about the hedonism.

So, a lot of companies go to a lot of trouble to give people a great time in Cannes. DDB take their staff out for a lovely lunch and afternoon of watersports. Production companies whisk people off on boats to Eden Roc. RSA hired Vanessa Paradis and Jonny Depp’s villa for their party on Saturday (There are no words.) Shots put on an amazing party on the beach. Yahoo made a giant sand sculpture. Finger Music and Adelphoi had incredible pool parties in the hills. Etc.

So yes, Cannes is a wonderful experience, and we felt very lucky to be at some of these places. But, while in a rosé-tinted stupour, we began to wonder about the whole festival. It’s about celebrating creativity. And yet, the events companies sometimes put on aren’t that ‘original’. They’re bloody brilliant, and unforgettably fun, don’t get us wrong. But maybe there are some little touches that companies could make, so they stand out a bit. Maybe they don’t need to? But if event organizers did want to do something different next year, here are a few suggestions that would make Cannes even better. Admittedly, they may well be the kind of 3.a.m. ideas which seem great at the time. But we thought we’d share them anyway.

1) Bowling alley-style shoe exchange at the beach parties – ‘Size 5, is it?’ You could have this at places like the Shots party, where high-heels quickly become redundant in the sand, and are also the cause of many arse-over-tit embarassments. So here we think a shoe exchange would be great – ideally with Shots branded flip-flops that are perhaps sponsored by Havaianas (so people will keep them). Lol has vague memories of telling this idea to someone Shots-related on the night, who then suggested the Havainas collaboration, but we are not sure who it was?

2) Pop up Greasy Spoons – A company could host a pop up greasy spoon on The Croisette and offer free big fry up breakfasts to help people with their hangovers and line their stomachs. A spindly baguette and jam just doesn’t quite do the job somehow. Especially not for ten stinky euros.

3) Free branded taxis – A company could put on a fleet to take people home. Most people get stuck up in villas and end up having to circumnavigate their way down the hills to get home again. People would really appreciate this. Many a horror story (or uber-blister) could be prevented.

4) Makeup on the Move – Going from a pool party to an evening party can be a bit tricky for the ladies, so organizers could have makeup artists at the ready to show off their talents while also helping you get ready for the night. Then maybe you’ll think kindly of them next time you’re needing a make up artist.

5) Lost and Found – A lost property pick up service. Who didn’t lose something this year?? So many things get left at parties. A company could put on an emergency van that will pick stuff up for you.

So really, we got to thinking, what are the problems of Cannes, and how can the people with money try and solve them? This way, people will think even more fondly of the company next time they’re looking for directors/production companies/sound designers etc.

We also started thinking of how many brilliant collaborations could come out of this. But will save that for a second blog.

N.B. – Having said all this, it is extremely likely that there were other parties we weren’t invited to. So if something party-related struck you as innovative this year, let us know.

Any other ideas, feel free to add.

Merci beaucoup.